i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
