Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Randomize
