I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
