if you like me you must not know who I am
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
