Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Randomize
