Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I just found puke in my bra..
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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