I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
