Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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