We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Damn victory sex feels great
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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