I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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