Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
