my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Your penis caused this!
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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