Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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