K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
porn star boner night. come get it.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
