She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
