the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
