Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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