she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Randomize