Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize