bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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