Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
