THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Randomize
