absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
