If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize