Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
my sisters under your porch take her home
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
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