omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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