i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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