i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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