glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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