I like my sex mixed with concussions.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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