I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
