Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
