You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Randomize
