Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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