im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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