i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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