he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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