i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I'm always down for nudity.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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