So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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