omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
