Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I understand Curling. That high.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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