Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
