omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
