So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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