its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
