We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
