Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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