I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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