how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
