return my video game
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
